Ahiahi mārie, welcome to The Spinoff Daily. Today on The Spinoff: Has David Seymour ‘saved’ school lunches – or enshittified them? If the police call you while you’re driving, should you pick up? And why a sullen former All Black is the breakout star of this season of Celebrity Treasure Island.
“Suddenly there were a lot of people in the room. They wanted to do a C-section, now. The doctors visibly relaxed when I agreed to it; I wasn’t going to make this difficult for them. They pumped more anaesthetic into my spine, via the epidural. In the operating theatre, I started shaking violently. My teeth were slamming together, over and over. I put my hand over my mouth and squeezed my jaw as tight as I could, trying to make it stop. I couldn’t see or feel what they were doing to my body. The sudden sound of a baby’s cry was shocking. He hadn’t been in the room, and now he was. I saw his back for a moment as someone carried him away, then I turned my head sideways and dry-heaved. Someone brought the baby back and lay him next to my head. I couldn’t stand the proximity; I felt so sick. They took him away again. After they stitched me up, I was wheeled to a different room, and my teeth stopped chattering. Abby came in, holding the baby, and lay him down next to me. She took a photo, the first photo ever taken of him: Elliott. In the picture, my skin looks green. Elliott is bright red, swaddled, massive. They wouldn’t discharge me till my heart rate went back down to normal. Nurses came in and measured it every hour, all day, all night, until it finally slowed four days later. Because of Covid, there were no visitors and I wasn’t allowed to leave the room – not that I could anyway, with a catheter in and every layer of muscle in my stomach sliced open. So it was just me and Elliott, alone together. He looked like Michael: big nose, sticky-out ears, hooded eyes. They were both strangers to me.”
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The slow and painful process of falling in love with my son
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